Don’t Take it Personally

“Why is this happening to ME??”

I bet you heard it often. Or said it often (?). But do you ever wonder amongst 7 billion people on earth; why would you be the object of this particular happening? Are you the chosen one?

I didn’t think so either.

I read somewhere that the events that happen in the universe are actually neither positive, nor negative. They’re actually neutral. And it’s not ‘meant’ for anyone at all. So why do they sometimes have positive or negative impact on us? Only because we, people, perceive them so. And why do we feel like they happening TO us? Because for some reasons we can yet fathom, we just happen to occupy the same time and space as the events or occurrences Again, it’s just a matter of perception.

Ilustrasi oleh Tom Gauld untuk The Guardian
Ilustrasi oleh Tom Gauld untuk The Guardian
This also applies to relationships with other beings (I won’t just say human, let’s not close any possibilities). When you think or say; “this person must hate me so much because this person keeps doing things I dislike around me”. Let’s just put on brakes on those kind of thoughts and think instead; “this person is just being him or herself. He or she just acts out of habit, belief and principal and I just happen to be around him or her when this person does. It’s not directed to me”.

What if there are people who obviously don’t like you? And maybe they even say it although not directly to you? It’s not you again, it’s still them. Don’t get me wrong, we do still to reflect if we unknowingly hurt them, but if it’s verified that we haven’t, just accept it and let go. If we know we live right, we don’t hurt people intentionally or otherwise, physically or otherwise, it’s most probably who we are or what we do doesn’t match their beliefs. Maybe even provoke their fear. Let it be. Don’t be so vain, it’s never about you. Even death is not personal. It’s just the cycle of life.

So next time something unfortunate happens to you, just take it as it is. Don’t judge. You lost something or someone? You know from the start that nothing or no one lasts forever, so why getting too attached in the first place? Of course you love them, but maybe someone else need them, or people have to move on and be at different places as we are. Let them be.

Wouldn’t it be so much easier to live our lives if we could remind ourselves to be in this state of mind all the time?

But I could be wrong. Maybe everything is – in fact – personal.

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